yay. happy 3rd month. but i am spending it alone in singapore.
i am so bored. maple and dota seems bored because of the rain. it had been raining for the whole day and the weather is so cold. i wonder if it is raining as badly as it is in singapore as it is in malaysia.
nothing much to blog about today. let's talk about families^^
who does not love to be part of a happy family. yea. like those you see on tv shows. early morning. mother wakes to make breakfast. and proceed to wake up the children and husband to eat what she prepares. husband goes to work after it. and the kids get to do what they want after that. this is what i call a happy family. where every one agrees with one another. supports their decision and most importantly peace among each other. let's not talk about those on tv shows. i am sure in this world there are families like this. or rather there are such families in singapore. i really admire these families. how they got their family to live in harmony under 1 roof.
well. i happen to be born into a totally different family enviroment. every day you wake up. you go through shit before you go to sleep. well. at least it is that way for me. i wake up. and go through all this shit. it is not easy being in this family. i have a family of 4. dad mum sis and me. just a small family living in a hdb flat. there is always just enough food on the table. not more. maybe some times less. i dunno. so to sum it up. we are not rich. nor are we poor. maybe just a little.
i guess the main problem with this family of mine is the lack of money. well. maybe money to you guys might not be everything, but to this family of mine. it is.you see, my dad is a taxi driver. he pays 90 dollar rental. 30 dollars guess PER DAY. that is excluding other expenses like phone bills and our expenses. my mum works as a cashier? or something in the kopitiam. she never mentions about her pay. she seldoms help in the house's expenses anyway. my sister is in her poly 1st year now. works during last holidays. is rich. but still leeches off dad. and alot of it .
now that you know the problem, let's talk about what is happening in my life. i am seldom on good terms with the 3 of them. first of all. my sister. she thinks she is god. and directs my parents around. her problem is well, thinking she is god. some times she acts as a winged messenger too. getting information about my life and leaking it out to my parents. so they know what i am doing. and proceed to pick on me. the main reason she is still here being able to get me into deep shit is of course the support of my parents. that's basically my sister's role. finding the chance to screw me.
next my mum. she does not care much about me. just nags occasionally and reporting every single movement to my life's dictactor. my dad of course. i guess i am a super endangered species. my movement is under 24 hours survelliance. what to do? i was born into this.
and then. the once who thinks he own my life. every night. without fail, he will pick on me. what for? i do not know. he pick on me after hearing complains from my mother and sister. well. he is not a well brought up guy. he scolds me using vulgar. insults me. and misunderstood me all along. i dunno what does he wants from me. nor do i know what do i want from him. i just want some one who can respect me and my decisions and support them. not trying to tell me what to do and comparing me to every other teenager every single time. this makes me feel so inferior. but nvm. he stops everything i am doing all the time. he is such a pain in the neck. i believe i am a pain in the neck to him as well. so why can't we just not cross each other's path. but NO. he cant get his nose ( and the other 2 noses) out of my life. he insists that everyone in this family have the right to pick on me. just that they are older then me. but so wad if they are older. i am already 16 and know what is right and wrong. being older means nothing. it only means that you guys will die before me. so this dad of mine. just keeps listening to what they tell him. and proceed to wreck my life. the worse thing is. whenever he talks to me. he shouts. and i cant talk back. he will only shout louder. so imagine guys. what it feels like to have totally no say in your family. some times people just never think. when your son cannot sleep at night. he will naturally play some games on the computer. but yet this guy here. scolds his son for not sleeping. what logic is it. he rather me watch the tv(using the same amount of electricity) then use my com. he claims that using com for too long spoils my eye. wad about watching tv? totally no logic. what's worse is he wants me to work. with so little money per day. the money i get can barely cover transport fees. i dun even get money to top up my ezlink card. yet he dun want me stay at home to use my com. and i cant go out. see? how this things contradict themselves.?
some times i step back and look on the smaller picture. the 3 of them without me. beautiful. everyone can suck up to everyone. gaining personal benefits. then i wont be sabotaged. and probably feel much better.
alright. much more to post. but dun feel like going on. it's still raining hours after it started. what luck. and oh yes. the one who thinks she is god will probably find this post and show it to the dictactor again. and no prizes for guessing what i will get again from him. =)
yea. happy 3rd month once again.
i am so bored. maple and dota seems bored because of the rain. it had been raining for the whole day and the weather is so cold. i wonder if it is raining as badly as it is in singapore as it is in malaysia.
nothing much to blog about today. let's talk about families^^
who does not love to be part of a happy family. yea. like those you see on tv shows. early morning. mother wakes to make breakfast. and proceed to wake up the children and husband to eat what she prepares. husband goes to work after it. and the kids get to do what they want after that. this is what i call a happy family. where every one agrees with one another. supports their decision and most importantly peace among each other. let's not talk about those on tv shows. i am sure in this world there are families like this. or rather there are such families in singapore. i really admire these families. how they got their family to live in harmony under 1 roof.
well. i happen to be born into a totally different family enviroment. every day you wake up. you go through shit before you go to sleep. well. at least it is that way for me. i wake up. and go through all this shit. it is not easy being in this family. i have a family of 4. dad mum sis and me. just a small family living in a hdb flat. there is always just enough food on the table. not more. maybe some times less. i dunno. so to sum it up. we are not rich. nor are we poor. maybe just a little.
i guess the main problem with this family of mine is the lack of money. well. maybe money to you guys might not be everything, but to this family of mine. it is.you see, my dad is a taxi driver. he pays 90 dollar rental. 30 dollars guess PER DAY. that is excluding other expenses like phone bills and our expenses. my mum works as a cashier? or something in the kopitiam. she never mentions about her pay. she seldoms help in the house's expenses anyway. my sister is in her poly 1st year now. works during last holidays. is rich. but still leeches off dad. and alot of it .
now that you know the problem, let's talk about what is happening in my life. i am seldom on good terms with the 3 of them. first of all. my sister. she thinks she is god. and directs my parents around. her problem is well, thinking she is god. some times she acts as a winged messenger too. getting information about my life and leaking it out to my parents. so they know what i am doing. and proceed to pick on me. the main reason she is still here being able to get me into deep shit is of course the support of my parents. that's basically my sister's role. finding the chance to screw me.
next my mum. she does not care much about me. just nags occasionally and reporting every single movement to my life's dictactor. my dad of course. i guess i am a super endangered species. my movement is under 24 hours survelliance. what to do? i was born into this.
and then. the once who thinks he own my life. every night. without fail, he will pick on me. what for? i do not know. he pick on me after hearing complains from my mother and sister. well. he is not a well brought up guy. he scolds me using vulgar. insults me. and misunderstood me all along. i dunno what does he wants from me. nor do i know what do i want from him. i just want some one who can respect me and my decisions and support them. not trying to tell me what to do and comparing me to every other teenager every single time. this makes me feel so inferior. but nvm. he stops everything i am doing all the time. he is such a pain in the neck. i believe i am a pain in the neck to him as well. so why can't we just not cross each other's path. but NO. he cant get his nose ( and the other 2 noses) out of my life. he insists that everyone in this family have the right to pick on me. just that they are older then me. but so wad if they are older. i am already 16 and know what is right and wrong. being older means nothing. it only means that you guys will die before me. so this dad of mine. just keeps listening to what they tell him. and proceed to wreck my life. the worse thing is. whenever he talks to me. he shouts. and i cant talk back. he will only shout louder. so imagine guys. what it feels like to have totally no say in your family. some times people just never think. when your son cannot sleep at night. he will naturally play some games on the computer. but yet this guy here. scolds his son for not sleeping. what logic is it. he rather me watch the tv(using the same amount of electricity) then use my com. he claims that using com for too long spoils my eye. wad about watching tv? totally no logic. what's worse is he wants me to work. with so little money per day. the money i get can barely cover transport fees. i dun even get money to top up my ezlink card. yet he dun want me stay at home to use my com. and i cant go out. see? how this things contradict themselves.?
some times i step back and look on the smaller picture. the 3 of them without me. beautiful. everyone can suck up to everyone. gaining personal benefits. then i wont be sabotaged. and probably feel much better.
alright. much more to post. but dun feel like going on. it's still raining hours after it started. what luck. and oh yes. the one who thinks she is god will probably find this post and show it to the dictactor again. and no prizes for guessing what i will get again from him. =)
yea. happy 3rd month once again.
posted by Nicol at
12:39 AM
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